Pontifex Limerix II
This new title’s an ungainly bother: ‘Pope Emeritus’! Wouldn’t you rather It were short, sharp, and clean? ‘Ex-H.H. B-16′, E.g.; too, perhaps, ‘Holy Grandfather’.
View ArticlePontifex Limerix III
Imagine Pope Benedict’s goal In announcing his long years’ harsh toll — The whole conclave, the smoke — Was to set up one joke From the window: ‘Habetis ********!’
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‘There once was a Catholic dandy…’
Jules Amédée Barbey d’Aurevilly on Wikipedia There once was a Catholic dandy; Collar-pins and cufflinks were his candy. As he fixed his tie-dimple, He thought: ‘Here’s a temple So furnished as God...
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Dorian is coming….
She’s coming fast and hard with vengeful spite: You’d better ready yourself now As she prepares to sweep The beaches bare, Her eye Will spy Most anywhere The rapey, killy creep Who dares to scare her...
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Birthday alert
Once there was a poet named JOB Whose lines would have wound round the globe If laid end to end, Fingered and penned And cascading down from his lobe.
View ArticleDept. of Doggerel
I’m sure this has been done, but last night, while in my cups at a party featuring poetry and music from those in attendance, I scribbled this. I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and...
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Driver Hate
To be sung to the tune of “Driver 8” With apologies to Berry, Mills, Buck, Stipe. The van, it speeds up, drifting lane to lane And the kids assigned seats one by one And the homeschooling dad says...
View ArticleCouplet for Ash Wednesday
Korrektivians enjoy (being bad) Lent, to Easter as to Christmas is Advent.
View ArticleLimerick for St. Pat’s
Now Scotch, it tastes too much of peat And Bourbon, it’s just a hair sweet But your Saint Paddy’s Day Won’t gang aft agley If your whiskey is Irish, served neat
View ArticleTitle for my eventual volumne of collected poetry
Caterwauls & Doggerels Which reminds me, I need to finish the poem I started for the Lansing Priest’s ordination: A priest makes men uneasy – how dare he what he does?/Standing in the breach ‘tween...
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Resolut-ouch!
Resolutions should be painful Otherwise they wouldn’t require you to be resolute, they’d only require acquiescence, like all the activities that lead to resolutions, you know, activities that are,...
View ArticleThree Short Poems
Light Shineth in Darkness Whenever we played Scrabble, we used an old Crown Royal bag of purple felt to grabble in dark chaos for each new tile. Speculating About My Nieces’ Future Hobbies Some day,...
View ArticleThree Short Poems
In Vento et Rapida Aqua Even if her words could be written on wind and rapid water, they were seductive and sussurant— and electric. I sought her again and again, wanting to be bitten again, to feel...
View ArticleSts Methodius and Cyril
Sts Methodius and Cyril, two brothers from Thessalonika, brought prayers and a bible and a supply of Spanakopita to Moravia. Since Slavs don’t speak Thessalonikan or Greek, the brothers invented the...
View ArticleTwo Short Poems About Fashion Designers
Fashion Their Passion “Well! You certainly have a fine looking tie, M. Blass,” said M. Saint Laurent, fluffing his own pavonine ascot, he himself looking très bien. Fashionable Exclamation When the...
View ArticleThree Short Poems about Nature, Red in Tooth and Claw
Whether You Call It a Wolverine, a Glutton, a Carcajou, a Skunk Bear, or even the Demon of the North, this Beast is Fierce in Any Language G. gulo can make you sick—catch a whiff of that anal stink and...
View ArticleFour Very Short Poems About Money
In Hock to the Chicoms To obtain our quittance will require no mere pittance. Banking on the Bureaucracy Once based on industry, my annuity was endangered by the tenuity of recent returns. A new...
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Korrektiv announces new Latin literary find
Long thought to be a fabulous hoax played by Hugh Kenner on Ezra Pound for his 75th birthday, the “Mucorix Manscript,” as it has come to be known, has been baffling scholars for years. But now a...
View ArticleFour Short Poems About 19th Century American History
Lewis & Clark, November 3, 1805 Not very many have canoed through such a vastitude. On the Applegate Trail, April 10, 1845 When the Native Americans set fire to the settlers’ covered wagon,...
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